Summary of The Art of Nonviolent Communication

  1. Requests are things for which you’re okay hearing a “no” response. Otherwise, they’re demands, and demands are not productive.
  2. Requests should say what the other person should do, not what he should stop doing.
  3. Vague requests like “please be more careful” don’t help. They’ll agree to it, because it sounds like a good thing, but since no specific action is being requested, nothing will change.
  4. Requests shouldn’t be coupled with criticism such as “You’re careless. (criticism) Can you turn up on time? (request)” That will cause the person to fixate on the criticism, ignoring everything else.

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Consulting CTO. Earlier: Google | Founder | CTO | Advisor

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Kartick Vaddadi

Kartick Vaddadi

Consulting CTO. Earlier: Google | Founder | CTO | Advisor

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